Finally, I’ve started an emigration fund. For the longest time, I’ve wanted to move my whole life to Japan, mostly because I feel like it’s where I belong, but also because that’s where the cartoon industry began. I want a job in animation…preferably as a voice actor. Sure, Dinki-Dai in Melbourne is a pretty good company, but it’s not like Australia is a massive bastion of animation.
I may not have been to Japan, ever, but I feel like I belong in that culture. I feel it…in my soul. Or ‘seishin’, as they say in Japan.
And that’s why I’m looking for a hardware store, in Bentleigh around where I work: so that I can start a side business making props for dress-up. I’ve never actually made anything with my hands, ever, but how hard can it be? I know everything there is to know about every single cartoon under the sun. If someone comes to me and is all like “I need you to make me a replica of Nero’s Blazing Meteor Catapult from My, Nero’s Rad Anemia!” Of course I know what that looks like, because I’ve seen every single episode and I’ve discussed the show at great length online, and I’ve greatly contributed to the online wiki. I can see the catapult in my head, clear as anything. I just have to take my hardware supplies, gather my timber, maybe give it a lick of paint, and hey presto: you’ve got yourself a cross between a sword and a catapult that’s five feet long. Easy.
Once I have my hardware supplies and my side business is booming, I’ll be able to save up to start a new life in the great land of the rising sun…Tokyoville.
I mean…Japan. I wonder if one day, when I’m a famous and respected voice actor, I’ll look back on those building supplies sold in Cheltenham. “What a whimsical time in my life,” I will think. “I wonder if I’ll ever take up timber and tools again.”
I won’t, though. I’ll be way too busy, and rich.